Too soon (I can’t let go)
Too much (It hurts me so).
Here I am again talking about nothing but love. Some may have grown sick and tired of it… I’m not one of them, obviously. In evolutionary time, love is new, and we’re still learning to get used to it. Love is not what all the fairy tales tell us, its not all about price charming trying to save his princess and soon after that they will live happily ever after. Love reveals itself when you release you’re need to have the object of your affection, and see that there’s no reason to make it yours. That is exist at all is enough. To love something is to disappear in its favor, to die to your own interest so that it can be what it is.
Defining it is almost impossible. You can throw words at it bit never pin it down. Nothing is misidentified than love. But for now, we can know what love is not—-it it hurts.
Last thought at night, first thought in the morning. If this is something and it’s not love, what is this? 😊
There are times where I want to tell the world about you.
There are moments when I want to tell them how happy I am that I met you.
I want to tell them how lucky I am because I have you, but with no assurance up to what extent.
There are times I want to ask them if it’s worth all the wait or or if it’s worth a try.
But I can only tell them a thing or two.
The ones who bring great joy often know great pain. 😔#RIPRobinWilliams
I don’t want to go back in time because it makes me feel like I’m trying to embarrass myself but hey, I’ve come a long way, you know! But now, I feel like I’m getting fatter and fatter. I think I’ve consumed every ounce of motivation and determination that I got before and now I feel like I’ve finished my journey and just stop there. Aarrggghhh…. I hate this kind of feeling. like you’re trying to boost up your determination and then suddenly the other side of your being is telling you that “it’s okay, don’t be too hard on yourself. eat everything you want, you worked hard for it! You can always hit the gym later!” And then the other side of my being will tell me “no, you’ll get fat. Once you do, you can’t stop!” But the hard thing is, that side of my being where it pushes me to have anything I want wins!.
The harder part is I can’t evern push myself to get up and run a mile or two and I can’t even find myself thinking of going to the gym!!!!! Mothereffer!!!!!!!!!
i am so afraid to weigh myself because I know from the bottom of my stupid brain, I fooled myself into believing that it would be easy for me to lose all that i gained. But it isn’t. I’m struggling….
The hardest part is starting anew. You want to start all over but you don’t know how to start, where to start and when to start.
I don’t know if I can still motivate myself like how I did before. i don’t know if i can still push myself to my limits. I dont know if i can still manage to last the day without rice, without coffee, without chips, without soda, without chicken… I don’t know if my weekends will still be as fun as before without cheatmeals. I don’t know ifI can still enjoy a movie without a popcorn and a soda in my hand. I can’t imagine myself eating biscuits and boring wheatbreads and munch salad all day. But Im doing this for myself and not for anyone else to be fit and healthy and not for anyone else or for any other reason. If I did it before, I can do it better this time! #HolyCrapYouGotHot #ICanBeWhatIWantToBe
Going back in time when I wish I had short hair. Now that my hair is short, I’m missing my long hair. Patience is really a thing that matters when it comes to waiting for your hair to go back the way it used to, after cutting it short every damn week just because you can’t find the right length for you until it reached that length where you can no longer choose to cut it shorter because every inch lost is an inch away from your goal! But i really don’t regret the choice I made when I cut it short. At that moment in time I really want it short. Since I was young, ive been wanting to have a short hair but I never really had the courage to do so. Now, I know the feeling!for once, I was happy with it! But there are disadvantage to it. Like when you are getting fatter everyday! And then you tend to act like a boy and they treat you like a boy! Hahaha! No, but I just really want my long hair back. Well not too long. I just want my hair long! Just because….. #Patience #ShortHairDontCare #LongHairInDueTime
The way I feel? It’s like the weather. The sun is shining down on me, like how the rain is pouring endlessly, both at the same time. It’s like having a simultaneous and conflicting feelings towards something…. Like how a mind and a heart argue about how things should be. Like how happy I am when I talk to you but sad at the same time because I don’t know if I make you happy the same way as you make me.